Dragon mechanic of the coast

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
draconic-damnation
homunculus-argument

Imagine losing your phone (or having it stolen, nobody's entirely sure) but you've got the location thing on so you can check from your computer where the phone is when it's turned on. You try to map out where the fuck it is, but it's been wandering around in places that don't have maps and people shouldn't access. It turns out that no matter who stole it, a fucking raccoon has it now, and you're pretty much run out of battery. You need this phone so you try to fervently figure out how the fuck you're going to get it back.

Okay, it hasn't been moving in a raccoon-like fashion for a while, so you're pretty sure that it's not being carried around by the raccoon anymore. Oh, it looks like it's been found, someone turned it on and charged it! A notification pings on your computer, someone has sent a message from your phone!

"23rqrferq233rqrw434r". The phone is moving on the GPS again. It has been picked up by another fucking raccoon!

...And that is roughly how I picture Sauron feeling when the Ring was once again carried by another hobbit.

petallswildsurge
femme-bo

UGH is is literally so much to ask that I have time and money to learn how to tailor clothes and embroider and knit and make cakes and bake bread and do makeup and hair and nails and do all my own diy projects around the house and

femme-bo

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like I know this is probably so hard to make but my brain says I could do that and I need to do that

femme-bo

btw since this I have been beautifully and painfully trying to learn to cook, crochet, sew, paint etc and oh boy am I mediocre at a bunch of things but I’m having fun

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pyracantha14

that-edgy-gal
froggybangbang

Have you ever seen a poster and thought.

Wait what.

I just did so i googled


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Huh. That seems.... not that far? What about...


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Okay. Okay that's... still.... but maybe I'm seeing distances wrong let's try what the poster said


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.....

Huh. That's. I'm. Wait what is...


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Okay so the international space station is roughly 10 times closer to me than the west coast is that's fine this is fine I'm fine what

ignescent

Up is very very near by, it's just hard to get to, because the planet loves us very much and hates to let go.

stainedpurplehoodie
gettiregretti

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No one asked but I think the secret to making the enemies-to-lovers trip work is respect. They can loath each other, but they have to loath each other as equals. Like “sorry but no one else is allowed to murder this man but me” + “it’s an honor and privilege to despise you.”

queenofattolia

#oh that is KEY#it’s enemies-to-lovers not ‘just some upsetting person-to-lovers’#they have to Matter to you in one specific direction of which the polarity gets flipped#the other one is also a thing but it’s a different Thing#enemies to lovers is based on them being the most important person in the room - its just that the reason inverts (via @harrietvane​)

catboymoments

Anonymous asked:

did you ever make a post abt how witches have children in toh? i swear i saw a post about the logic/magic behind witch reproduction but it might not have been by you. Sorry for the odd question!! :>

catboymoments answered:

I was pretty sure I posted the original here so I was gonna link it but I can’t find it on my blog atm, so here’s what I drew for it a bit ago! Gonna put it under the cut for stuff with anatomical nudity and sexual reproduction talk, nothing pornographic but there Are images of bits


Keep reading

catboymoments

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I mean witch fetuses can be much more… intense considering everything we know about the boiling isles so you gotta have a strong uterus to keep them in line LOL

juniperarts
writing-prompt-s

A silent Spider-Man is a terrifying Spider-Man - if he’s not cracking jokes, then it means he’s 100% focused on taking you down. You, a run-of-the-mill two-bit hoodlum, are running for your life from a Spider-Man who has not uttered a single word.

floof-ghostie

Plot twist: That Spider happens to be non-verbal

juniperarts

Double plot twist: That spider is also deaf and only communicates in ASL 👍

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